The impact of isolation on mental health and people with disabilities

Recently, I became a part of an ever-growing local statistic. Not just any statistic, but that statistic that we all hope not to be a part of these days. After being confirmed positive for COVID-19 with two antigen test results, and the full nine yards of symptoms, I was ordered to quarantine and isolate myself at the government quarantine site for 10 days, as per the protocols at the time. It was a whirlwind of a day, having to inform my employer, my family, those I had come in close contact with, deal with packing, briefings and all—I finally sat down in my designated room, facing the only person I had for these next 10 days: myself.

It is not an easy task transitioning from one lifestyle to another one, even if it be just temporarily. I had gone from being out 15 hours a day to staying in just one place…for what seemed like forever. I found myself feeling restless. I was constantly searching for distractions and trying to convince myself that this is not as bad as people make it seem. I ate my words in my first 48 hours. The deafening silence in my room late at night as I tried to sleep overwhelmed me with feelings of loneliness, self-doubt, and, quite honestly, fear. I was afraid of being alone and doubted that I could go the whole way before cracking under the pressure that isolation forces you to feel. Admittedly, I did crack and experienced a rollercoaster of emotions that I never knew I kept within me. The walls of the room felt confining and I couldn’t help but wish that we (the isolated individuals) could’ve at least had 15 minutes to go out and get some fresh air, or take a walk around the building or by the beach. Something to get us out and feel the sun, the air, the wind…to feel something other than the feelings that overwhelm us when we’re alone.

At the Northern Marianas Protection and Advocacy Systems Inc., otherwise known as NMPASI, we serve to protect the civil, legal, and human rights of individuals with disabilities. One of our programs specifically is catered toward the protection and advocacy for individuals with mental illness (PAIMI program). With mental health conditions increasing worldwide—about 13% globally according the World Health Organization—it is apparent that we need to continue to advocate for proper mental health services and resources for our people, especially those who have current existing mental health needs. When a person qualifies for our program, I’ve seen our advocates go above and beyond to ensure that services are being administered for our clients and if not, then the appropriate steps toward a resolution are taken. Every situation, every case, is dealt with in its own specific manner, as no one client who seeks our services is ever the same. Regardless, solutions are made, resolutions are found, and our clients’ rights are clarified and protected. It is a sight to see and I’m grateful to be a part of that journey.

I admire all those who work in the field of mental health, whether it be as front-liners or behind the scenes folk; it is not an easy task carrying the load of another. But maybe that’s just what we need more of. During my isolation period, despite the numerous “get well soon” messages and positive affirmations I received, I still had those lingering feelings creep up on me every so often and I let them take their course. However, I’m grateful to those who allowed me to share this insecure and sensitive part of myself with them. Thank you for helping me bear my load. It is important to hold on to those genuine acts of concern and meaningful interactions from others, whether it be big or small. It got me through and made me excited to seek my freedom from isolation and utilize it, perhaps more responsibly this time.

In short: stay positive, but test negative CNMI!

For more information about protection and advocacy services for individuals with mental illness, please contact NMPASI at our office numbers (670) 235-7273/4, text message (670) 287-0652, or visit our website at www.nmpasi.org.

TIAVA TO’OMATA (Special to the Saipan Tribune)
Tiava To’omata is a program aide at the Northern Marianas Protection and Advocacy Systems Inc.