Lessons in lying

Humbug? Yes! It is BS.
“Bah!” said Scrooge. “Humbug!” from Charles Dicken’s A Christmas Carol, 1843.

“Humbug: deceptive misrepresentation short of lying, especially by pretentious word or deed, of somebody’s own thoughts, feelings, or attitudes.”
—Max Black, The Prevalence of Humbug, 1985
 
Deceptive misrepresentation in that we have a deliberate
deception of a given situation. Short of Lying, did you ever
hear the old saying, ‘I’m Dying if I’m Lying? Did you ever
think it is being said to convince you the Misrepresentation
or lie being told to you is True? The difference may be in the
degree of or the differences between what you already know,
hear, and see, or can think Through.
See for yourself, and, well, it was like that last time I looked.
I heard it right from the horse’s mouth! and of course the
children’s old favorite, Cross my heart and hope to Die!
The honorable humbug, a master of BS, has made an art of
deceptive misrepresentation with humor, Wit and Yes I guess
that dear reader is not BS or is It?
I have not learned to hold my Tongue. The tale is filled with
Dung and without humble Pie. He doesn’t know when to Quit.
It is Nothing but a bunch of horse Spit.
I cannot tell a Lie. So the apocryphal story goes about George
Washington chopping down a cherry Tree. George supposedly
admitted the Deed. Thus depriving the nation, he was destined to
Lead as its first president, of some delicious cherry Pie or Cobbler.
Wolfed down with well water or fresh milk by many the Gobbler.
Then there is Pinocchio whose every prevarication elongated the
problem with his Proboscis providing difficulties getting his first Kiss.
So the first president made a mistake and cut down a tree for Kindling.
Our 45th president has many emoluments and they’re not Dwindling.

None Can Legislate Like Irishmen
“You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make them think.”
—American comic, ‘Uncle Miltie’ Milton Berle
 
None can legislate like Irishmen Ryan and McConnell
ask the King of Bling who scorns these leading two
who sends insulting tweets in the name of Donald
pays mistresses to close their mouth more payments due
no one else but his lawyers are supposed to see
yet the information is leaking out all over the place
in major city newspapers, on line and channel TV
with 45 not worried one bit about saving face
the new Don, the old Don, the Don unashamed 
the King of Debt, Trumpty Dumpty, leading states red
continues demagoguery regardless what he’s nicknamed
regardless of rational advice or what Congress said
but he’ll never pass legislation like those two Irishmen
from Capitol Hill to Mar A Lago’s greens and back again.