Success, or something close to it

If there’s one thing in the world bigger and more enduring than Mt. Tapochau, it’s the towering pile of books about how to be successful. The shelves of modern bookstores are fairly constipated with such tomes. Some of them are thoughtful. Others, however, are merely anthologies of pop-psychology bromides, feeding an emotional society’s hunger for feel-good slogans and easy answers.

Which is all fine with me. I don’t have a dog in the fight.

But it’s a fine day to sit on my lawn chair and think big thoughts. After all, I’m too undisciplined today to actually perform any work. My day has been entirely unsuccessful.

So, by my law of contrary logic, it makes a perfect day to contemplate success. Or at least something close to it, since I can’t really define it. Anyway, I’ll list what I think are the three top factors that seemed to help the successful people I’ve known.

Let’s heed that “I’ve known” clause. I’m not offering a grand theory of success here. I have no such theory. I’m just scrolling through my mental Rolodex, pulling some cards, and noting what they seem to have in common.

I’m not claiming these are the only three factors at issue. Nor am I claiming that randomness itself is not a huge factor. After all, a wino can stagger into a liquor store, buy a lotto ticket, and wind up being a multi-millionaire. Ah, now there’s the rub! Randomness is the hobgoblin of little minds these days, so if people would rather bet on the wino than a trust fund kid going to Harvard medical school, then who am I to argue?

From what I’ve seen, people who start off life with solid money behind them are far more likely to be successful than those who don’t. I’m confident enough in the correlation to consider the matter open, and now closed.

But I am going to take a tangent because of Saipan’s crossroads status in the Pacific.

Indeed, the eastern and the western attitudes toward this realm (the role of family wealth in generational success) are pretty much opposite. Therefore, a wise person will marry into the culture that meshes with their own outlook.

Not everyone heeds this fact. I’m starting to see some East meets West marriages turning into East met West divorces these days. The largest instigating factor, based on the tales of woe I am forced to listen to as I am served green tea and almond cookies, is the disparate cultural outlooks on “filial piety.”

Well, you’ve been warned. So don’t come crying to me. I never liked almond cookies.

Most of the successful people I’ve known have been entrepreneurs or professionals with credentials, such as surgeons, dentists, airline pilots, senior engineers, ship captains, lawyers, and financial pros.

The small remainder is a few artists (writers and actors) who hit the big time. When actors hit the big time, they really hit it big, but I have no idea how the dynamics of success work in the industry.

It’s hard to boil it all down, but if I had to guess, based on what I’ve seen, the most reliable means of being reasonably successful is to take the “professional with credentials” route, handling one’s money and affairs responsibly, while branching out into business endeavors (such as apartment ownership) on the side.

While the entrepreneurs can hit occasional home runs, getting rich enough to buy their own jets, the solid professionals seem to enjoy far more reliable base hits, at least knowing they’ll probably be comfortable. One cruel fact of life is that people probably don’t know until after the fact which path would be the right one for them, at which point, of course, it’s too late.

Of the highly successful people I’ve known, including guys well-heeled enough to own their own jets and who hired paupers like me to fly them, every singe one of them had good manners and social skills. All were pleasant to be around. Most were downright charming.

Only one was introverted. He was an Ivy-league mathematician who got big bucks in consulting, but he was nonetheless a very pleasant guy.

Incidentally, the popular concept of smart people and “nerds” paints them as introverts, but, though I’ve looked for the correlation, I’ve never seen it.