Behind the eight ball

Ed Stephens of this page sometime ago brought out a list of 8 verbs. I wondered how he got to 8 rather than lucky 7, 9, or 11. He is not even Chinese though he wrestles the Hanzi down, whose word for 8 is ba, a homonym for “happiness and prosperity,” explaining to the curious the preponderance of 8 in choices of P.O. box numbers and vehicular tags in Sinosphere and Saipan.

We count by base-10, the decimal system. Base-2—binary count using 0 and 1—is reliable but cumbersome; photo editing uses base-16, hexidecimal, that has digits 0 to 9 followed by the letter A to F for the first 16, then 10 to 19 followed by 1A to 1F plus 20, for the next 16. We shy away from those exact languages and stick to rugged human discourse, imprecise as that is.

Tardigrada or Waterbear, the creature in the language studios of Shenyang and Saipan that I am associated with, is an eight-legged microorganism. Spiders have the same number of legs. Society also keeps 8-counts and 8-shapes close to its chest. The lady at the beach is a figure 8, horizontal 8 is “infinity,” and a reclining 8 takes minds to jaded shadows!

Base-8 is a system of counting that uses an eight digit system, 0 to 7. Numbers “8” and “9” do not exist, digits are as follows: 0 to 7 are the first eight, the next is base doubled (8.8=64), and the next is cubed (8.8.8=512), then to the fourth (8.8.8.8=4096), fifth, sixth, and however far one’s calculating machine can take it. This is a way of thinking that a computer game programmer utilizes, though if you ask me how it works we move swiftly on to the next topic.

The late William Buckley, the Rapier Wit of the Right, TV host, prodigious writer who founded one of America’s conservative rags, had 8 verboten phrases for political journalists. I lived within D.C.’s beltway before he died, and though I was sympathetic to his way of thinking because he encouraged individuals to work out their own thoughts and be accountable for their deeds, we differed in the consequences of our resolves.

Buckley chose 8 for the number of no-no words; he could have conveniently chosen 10. His conservatively-held resolves were culturally conditioned rather than a consequence of clear thinking, IMHO! His choice of 8 rather than the decimal 10, however, revealed to me a mind whose leanings was toward poetry more than the strictures of objective science, my kind of thinker.

His rants against government stems from a distrust of group-think shown by the elitist institutions in his neighborhood, Yale and Harvard, thus abandoning any effort to join it. Conversely, I relished being in groupthink to influence and often subvert it, with wild logic and wayward deeds. 

Even Kalihi-bred former Honolulu mayor Mufi Hanneman of German-Samoan descent who just began writing for Tribune’s opinion page as “Marianas Matters” notes in his bio that he was Harvard-educated, though I was more impressed that he was a Kiwi in NZ at Wellington University.

We welcome the Honolulu mayor into the ST table! (My driver’s license address is Ewa Beach so Mufi was once my mayor!) We, too, think the Marianas matters. We write to effect paradigm shifts and change models. As Buckminster Fuller said: You never change things by fighting existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.

Back to “eight,” it is the street word for 3.5 grams of forbidden crystals, costly at the incarceration front and overdose end. Buckley once suggested that if drugs were cost at real market rate, it would be 90 times cheaper than as priced at the black market. Not supportive of the use of drugs, he favored unrestricted markets for its sale!

Eightball is a humorous comic book by Daniel Clowes who illustrates against the mainstream, made into an Academy Award-nominated film in the ’90s. Eight is also one of the magic numbers in nuclear physics but not science-literate, I shan’t lead you there.

Being “behind the eight ball” is finding oneself in a difficult situation not usually desired. “In a difficult situation” is a plus to Muslim friends that calls them to return to Allah’s side. (BTW Mufi is not a Mufti.) Ayatul Kursi reminds one that to “remember Allah is to know that Allah will remember you.” The Arabic word for “a clear sign of Allah” is “ayat” from where the word “Ayatollah” (who loves Allah) comes from. Ayat is also “love” in my Ilocano dialect!

The metaphor “behind the eight ball” derives from billiards where the black solid splits the table into 1-7 and 9-15 numbered balls. Contestants pocket assigned balls before aiming for the 8. To be behind the eight ball before clearing the table of one’s numbers is “being in a difficult place.”

I am currently behind the eighth ball (“shame on you”, a dear one quickly says, “that is private information”) but given the open-book nature of my existence, it hardly matters. I am not enamored by “eight.” It has not brought me closer to Allah, blessed be the name! But it has enabled this reflection on my situation and I decided I am happy and prosperous. Capiche?