Ridunkulous

Ridunkulous is slang for very ridiculous, as used in this sentence, “I have to finish this column before the power goes out” which is simply ridunkulous.

Lots of ridunkulous stuff happened in national sports last week. Let’s look at a few eyebrow raisers.

Jose Canseco has a book coming out appropriately enough on April Fool’s Day, “Vindicated: Big Names, Big Liars, and The Battle to Save Baseball,” which raises the question, who is the fool to buy that book?

Slime sunk to a new low when Canseco says he introduced A-Rod to a steroids pusherman yet produced no proof that his fellow Miami native ever used steroids and then registered another new low when he wrote that A-Rod lusted for his wife. Yes, the same beautiful woman that Canseco was arrested for assaulting and later divorced. I would not be surprised if the juicer needs to unashamedly peddle his book to pay her off.

A radio show in Miami asked Jose Juicer for a telephone interview. He wanted a thousand bucks or he wouldn’t go on air. Ridunkulous. Of course, the radio show said no.

The San Francisco Giants are taking all images of Barry Bonds out of the stadium. The only reminder of his historic home run record will be a plaque where his final home run landed. He goes from being the face of the franchise to faceless at AT&T stadium. The Giants move to erase Bonds from the collective memory of fans reminds me of the good ol’ days when the Soviets would take people out of history books when they fell out of Communist favor.

Don’t look now but the Giants batting lineup when they open next week has to be one of the worst since the War, far worse than even the Royals. The G-Men used all their regular starters and ace pitcher and lost to their Triple A minor league team last week. Ridunkulous.

MLB’s decision to open the season in Japan was more than curious, it was a brazen commercial slap at American fans who deserve to have the season open in their own parks. Opening Day of baseball is traditionally a big deal. And it was in Tokyo with sell-outs. Oakland fans who had to get up at 3am to watch their team could say MLB sold them out.

My own appreciation for seeing the games on primetime television here notwithstanding, it’s ridunkulous for teams to open the regular season and then go play exhibition games before playing more official games.

Once the season starts, the games should all be official. Instead, we see the earliest opening season in 132 years. And I thought the season was long enough already. Simply ridunkulous.